Staying connected & present in these times
Dear friends,
How are you? My mom and stepdad went through it in Asheville after the hurricane, because my stepdad is on oxygen full-time and they were without power for nearly two weeks, but their house is basically okay and they’re up and running again now. Whew. I deleted most of my frantic social media posts but after their power was restored I shared this photo above of the two of them in 1983, seated in the audience at the warehouse church my mom started and they both ended up pastoring.
Ancestor-related linkiness coming soon, but meanwhile here are some things I’m doing to stay connected and present without grinding my teeth to nubs in these troubled times, with the intention of doing my best to keep that sense of connectedness whatever happens in November.
Finding community in Sebene Selassie ’s Make Sacred Space on Sunday nights (the November installment is still open) and her Ancestors to Elements class on Wednesdays.
Writing postcards for Activate America as part of a larger get out the vote effort organized by Ethan Nichtern and friends. Collectively the group has written 5800 letters and postcards so far. Here are the mission statements of the various organizations they recommend: Vote Forward; Activate America; Working America. And here are links to choose by campaign/state/region: Vote Forward; Activate America; Working America. If you’d like to meet up remotely to write in real-time with the group, here’s the schedule:
Sunday, October 13, 9-10a PT (12-1pm ET) with Ethan Nichtern
Tuesday, October 15, 1-2pm PT (4-5p ET) with Ethan Nichtern
Sunday, October 20, 9-10a PT (12-1pm ET) with Ethan Nichtern
Tuesday, October 22, 1-2pm PT (4-5p ET) with Matthew Brensilver
Sunday, October 27, 1-2pm PT (4-5p ET) with Ethan Nichtern
Tuesday, October 29, 1-2pm PT (4-5p ET) with Matthew Brensilver
Switching to texting at some point before the election, maybe for a congressional campaign in a swing district. If your thumbs and wrists are tightening at the thought, know that campaigns have tools to enable text-banking from your computer. There are many ways that the Democratic party and I are not aligned, in particular on Gaza, but Project 2025 is deadly serious, and our extreme far-right Supreme Court is just getting warmed up on its radical agenda. Overturning Roe and Chevron was a bit of knuckle-cracking for them, to start things off.
Planting and tending natives. Some drought-tolerant pollinator favorites native to the NYC area, if you’re interested:
butterfly weed (Sun. Comes up late. Bright orange blooms late May - September.)
serviceberry (Sun. White blooms in May. Pretty fall color. The subject of Robin Wall Kammerer’s upcoming book.)
red chokeberry and black chokeberry (Sun. White blooms in May, gorgeous red leaves in fall. Berries)
chokecherry (Sun. White blooms in May. Berries. Super hardy and I’m hoping it will survive winter salt in a sidewalk tree bed.)
green and gold (Shade or part shade. Yellow blooms in May. Groundcover.)
phlox subulata (Sun. Pink blooms in May or earlier. Groundcover. Easy to propagate.)
coral honeysuckle (Sun. Prolific; good instead of wisteria or a climbing rose. Orange-red blooms from May to September.)
New Jersey tea (Sun. White blooms June-August); Virginia rose (pink blooms, June-August)
common milkweed (Sun. Round clusters of pink blooms, June - September.)
Virginia clematis (Sun. White blooms July-September; use rather than invasive non-native clematis)
Joe pye weed (Part shade. Purple-pink blooms July-September.)
White wood aster (Part shade to shade. White blooms August and September.)
Late Purple Aster, New York Aster, New England Aster, Smooth Blue Aster (Sun. Purple blooms vary but overall August to October.)
Showy goldenrod (Sun. Yellow tufts. Late bloomer.)
Gearing up to make spicy tomato soup (a Kate McKean favorite); potato leek soup (New Joy of Cooking recipe); lentil soup with kale ribbons (this recipe is very similar to the one I use, though mine is a slow cooker version and I add more garlic); and savory galettes (I like them with kale, chard, and fresh herbs; and I brush French mustard on the dough and top with a bit of parm before the greens are added, just the way Lauren Cerand first made a savory galette for me). Also, yesterday I served pumpkin ravioli with browned sage garlic butter and toasted pecans. Roasted herbed nuts. Hot toddies. Mugwort tea (or tincture) for dreaming. Also, for seasonal allergies (oof ragweed season), I take nettle tincture or tonic now rather than over-the-counter meds and it works well.
Listening to audiobooks rather than news when I’m tending to plants and animals and cooking. Some favorites of books I also love in print: Anita de Monte Laughs Last and Olga Dies Dreaming, two novels by Xochitl Gonzalez; The Love Songs of W.E.B. Du Bois, a novel by Honorée Fanonne Jeffers (whose new book, Misbehaving at the Crossroads, is coming next year); Wolf Hall and Bring Up the Bodies, both novels by Hilary Mantel I expect you’ve heard of (I keep stalling out on the third Cromwell book because our world is full of enough loss!) and also her An Experiment in Love (not a Cromwell book); Braiding Sweetgrass and Gathering Moss, both written and read by Robin Wall Kimmerer; When Women Were Birds, written and read by Terry Tempest Williams; I reckon I will also get myself a copy of Sarah Smarsh’s Bone of the Bone, so I can hear her essay collection in her voice.
Writing, writing, writing. I’m working on a novel, and I have a short story called “Rapture Basement” coming out pretty soon. I keep working on other stories connected to the “Rapture Basement” universe. I’m also tinkering with some nonfiction projects but haven’t committed to them yet. I have also, completely unexpectedly, been inspired recently by Philip Roth’s delight in throwing twisted versions of his life into fiction, and so (despite his misogyny) I do particularly recommend The Ghost Writer.
Getting back into some easy yoga techniques I learned from Kate Lynch, a kind, patient teacher who is comfortable working with neurodivergent students. If you’ve read Ancestor Trouble, you know I’m severely neurodivergent when it comes to movement and body knowledge—I relate a lot to the description of developmental coordination disorder; it’s frustrating for most teachers and so there aren’t many options for meaningful help as an adult. When I was at Sebene’s joy retreat last year, a fellow retreater encouraged me to reach out to Kate and I’m so glad I did. (I’ve also worked with the Alexander Technique teachers Ann Rodiger—in NYC—and Dan Cayer—now in Westchester—and recommend both.)
Seeing my magical intuitive acupuncturist Hongru Wie at Jade Hall Acupuncture in Forest Hills every few months. She’s currently on a reduced schedule during maternity leave. I also highly recommend Chul Paek, who’s based in Koreatown and taught me how to begin to manage my allergies with diet several years ago.
Staying open to the sacred, especially during this time of the thinning veil. I’ve been hovering at the edge of AODA the last couple of years and might commit at the solstice.
The comments are open if you’d like to share your own ways of staying connected and present when the world feels like it’s always catching fire in new ways.
Thank you, Maud, for all of this. For the Alexander Technique, acupuncture, and the great book recommendations. Sometimes we get so stuck in our own narrow focuses -- focii? -- that being jostled away from the tried and true is just what we need.
I'm glad your mother and stepfather are safe! And thanks for the recipes--I see a galette in my future.